38 Weeks and Counting.....

I am officially 38 weeks today and I must say that I am ready for our baby to be born!  The swelling, difficulty moving, getting up constantly every hour of the night, the fact that it takes 10 minutes to get repositioned in bed...all signs that I think I'm over pregnancy.  Also, at Walmart yesterday this four year-old boy was telling his mom about my big belly and she was like, "Of course it's big, she has a baby in there!"

I went to my midwife appointment today and everything checks out healthy with our little Appleseed.  Heart rate good, head down, beginning to engage.  I was disappointed that she wasn't able to strip my membranes though.  She said I was barely dilated.  My cervix is about 75% effaced though.  Then she started talking about how first time moms can be a week late (which I know, but I don't want to hear that about me!!!).

In the meantime, I am attempting, (very carefully Mom!), to naturally induce labor.  I am going to try all sorts of things that can bring labor on, but won't hurt me or the baby if my body isn't ready.  Bryon picked up some evening primrose oil (recommended by the midwife) to start trying tonight.  If it works, it should help soften my cervix more.  Then there is nipple stimulation...we are using the breast pump, which holy hell, freaking hurts my nipples!  On the bright side, it does appear to make contractions occur a little more frequently.  I am getting another massage tonight at the massage place (the last one on my contract, so I am springing for a 90 minute session).  Of course, Bryon and I are trying acupressure on my feet.  If you are doing it right, it hurts, but my feet are more relaxed after and it does cause some contractions to occur.  Then there is everyone's favorite suggestion...have lots of sex.  Um, hello?!  I'm definitely not opposed to the idea, but I am nine months pregnant and I don't think I have the energy anymore for those crazy, constant, teenage-hormone-induced sessions constantly.  I am going to attempt to start walking everyday and see if that helps (walking around Walmart yesterday definitely wore me out though!)

Speaking of contractions, I had a few Sunday night that reduced me to tears!  I've been having them off and on, but none like this!!!  Thankfully I had Bryon there reminding me to breath because I totally forgot to.  It's hard to do some self-hypnosis for pain control when the contraction just comes out of nowhere!!!!  Then there is the round ligament pain in my inner thighs that strikes whenever it wants to, usually when I am walking.  I double over and everyone kinda freaks (except Bryon and Asher because they are used to it).  I just have to  say, "It's okay, I'm not in labor, I swear!"

So who knows when our little man will make his appearance but one thing is for certain...Bryon and I can't wait for him to come out and play!!!!!!

Empathy for Those Who Hate the Dentist

A couple of weeks ago I went to my dental appointment.  A normal, routine cleaning.  Nothing too exciting.  Now I have have had tooth pain on and off for a couple of years.  It culminated in December of 2009 when my mom placed a piece of homemade fudge in my mouth and I almost hit the floor in tears and pain.  I wound up with an emergency visit to the dentist two days later less than 24 hours before I was to fly out to Alaska.  From then on I swore to myself: "I will make these dental appointments every six months like every good patient should!  Never again will I inflict this amount of pain on myself!"  Fast forward to the end of March 2011.  I had not been to the dentist since that last event in 2009.  I can make all the excuses in the world, but in truth, it wasn't  a top priority of mine.

Anyways, at this dental appointment, they found not one or two...but six...count them, SIX, cavities.  I have never had a cavity before in my whole life!  I think it was a combination of some really good sealants and luck.

I went to the first of three appointments today to have these cavities filled.  The dental office will only do two at a time because I am pregnant and it is uncomfortable to sit in that chair for an extended amount of time.  The first thing they did was put a topical anesthetic on.  Then came the shots of lidocaine.  Now, I am not needle-phobic. I do not fear medical procedures generally speaking.  But, Oh...My...Goodness!  The shots in my gum hurt like hell!  Then, I got sweaty from head to toe.  I mean I started dripping in sweat!  I felt like I needed another shower.  My heart rate went up, I felt like I was going to puke and pass out at the same time. I can't say for sure, but I am willing to bet that I turned a deathly shade of white.  So, they sat me up after the shots, gave me some water, and let me come back to normal.  The rest of the appointment went just fine, completely without incident.  The whole numbing procedure probably took less than five minutes but I think it just may have scarred me for life.

Now that I am home, three hours later, the anesthetic has completely worn off and my teeth and jaw ache!  I can only take acetaminophen (Tylenol) for pain and for this kind of pain I really need an anti-inflammatory (like ibuprofen).  Unfortunately, ibuprofen is off-limits for this pregnant chick.  Oh well, I can survive this!

I completely empathize with those who may be dentist phobic.  I don't think I am going to freak or be any more anxious at my appointment next week but I could see how someone might continue to draw on a freaky incident like mine and let it affect how every future dentist visit goes.

Wish me luck for the next two appointments!

There's an Alien in My Tummy

I love feeling our baby move in my stomach.  He is getting so big that the movement is really pronounced right now.  And he is getting so big that sometimes that break-dancing hurts, especially if it is aimed towards a rib.

Sometimes though, this really morbid though crosses my mind.  You know those terrible sci-fi movies with the "excellent" graphics?  The one's where you see all this movement under someone's skin and then...SUDDENLY...either a pretty blue, green, or purple substance just bursts out.  Either that or some alien creature bursts forth into the world.

When the baby is really moving and rolling that is what I picture occasionally.  Not the sweet little baby that lives inside me right now but the crazy alien that is fighting for a way out.

I know, I am sick and twisted.  I blame my mother and my aunt for corrupting my mind as a small child.

Pregnancy Is...

Pregnancy is...the mix of feelings that comes when the test is positive...the excitement of sharing the news with loved ones...the days where you cry at the drop of the hat...the days where you feel completely like crap...the days where you feel fantastic...the awe that you have created someone magical with your husband...the first movement in your tummy...the first time you hear the heartbeat...the first time it dawns on you that this is really real...the look of happiness on your husband's face whenever he feels the baby kick...those moments alone where it's just you and the baby...the laughter of your son when he feels the baby kick...the ups and downs that go along with bringing new life into the world...seeing your baby on ultrasound...watching your baby flip you off and give you the thumbs up sign at the same time...knowing that your baby is healthy...taking joy in making things for your impending arrival...the time you get to spend with family and friends far away in celebration of your upcoming birth...questioning whether or not you are going to be a good mother even though you know the answer...looking at yourself in the mirror and sometimes not recognizing yourself...looking at pictures from pre-pregnancy and not recognizing yourself...trying not to fear the pain of labor...daydreaming about what life will be like after birth...knowing it won't be as glamorous as it might appear...loving every moment whether good or bad...

Am I Being Unrealistic?

I started the rough draft of this entry at 0110 in the morning at work the old-fashioned way, with pen and paper.  As I am out and about and meeting new people and sometimes the people I know, pregnancy is a hot topic of conversation.  Lately some of my interactions with people have led me to question my goals for labor and delivery.  I find my self wondering if I am being unrealistic in what I would like to have happen.

First, I would like to say that I generally welcome advice regarding pregnancy, labor, and delivery.  It's not like I have experienced it before.  Every day is a new adventure.  However, with that being said, I can't say that I welcome it from EVERY woman that I meet who has been through this miraculous process.

I don't think I can judge any woman's goals, make her feel bad about her decisions, or tell her "It's not going to happen like that!"  Some decisions are personal/individual and should be made by the woman and her support person after educating themselves on all the options available.  I feel that my goals could be viewed as unrealistic if I have not educated myself, have not prepared to make those goals achievable, and have not prepared myself for alternative options in the case that something occurs and I can't follow through with my plan.  As for what these goals are, they are not important for the purpose of this writing.  I plan to address them in a separate post.

Ultimately, the NUMBER ONE goal is to have a healthy baby!!

There are women out there (not every woman, it is not my intent to lump everyone into the same category!) who seem to view their birth experience as the only experience out there.  Because they had to have a c-section, or pain meds, or had their baby naturally, for example means that no other woman out there can do it differently and if another woman has a different plan then they are being...unrealistic.

There are women out there who view childbirth as a competition, the who can top who with their "war stories".  Saying, "I throw up every day after breakfast" to these women can lead to them saying, "Oh, well, I threw up six times a day throughout my entire pregnancy, why I even had to go to the hospital twice for fluid replacement."  You will never win with these women, eventually you quit talking about your pregnancy at all around them because they aren't listening to you anyways!!!

Pregnancy, labor, and delivery are not, I repeat, ARE NOT, a competition!!!  Each experience is unique to the person experiencing it.  No two women have the exact same experience because each woman, each situation is unique, each baby is unique.  Each experience has it's own mitigating factors that lead to the final outcome!

Now, with all of that being said, I would like to give a BIG THANKS to the women out there who have offered me good advice!  These are the women who have shared their experiences with me and have also shared what they learned during those experiences.  These are the women who have listened to my goals and offered ways they may have prepared for similar situations.  There are women who I truly value their opinions because they recognize their birth experience as something unique to them and are interested in how I am making this a unique experience for myself and my family.  I have learned about valuable resources to explore and different approaches to handling roadblocks that may come up.

For those women out there who are expecting or will be in the future let me say congratulations!  I am happy that you get to experience something that will be very special and unique for you! 

And...if I ever turn into one of those battle-wounded women out there, do me a favor: TELL ME!