When I was a kid I was very set in what I wanted to be when I grew up. I don't remember what aspirations I had prior to the age of eight, but I do know that in second grade my mind was made up.
I was going to be an author. Not just any type of author though. I wanted to be the next Ann M. Martin, author of
The Baby-Sitter's Club series. I want to be exactly like her! From the type of books she wrote to living single in an apartment in NYC with two cats. I don't really remember writing a lot during this time, I just knew I wanted to be an author.
This dream of being a famous author evolved through the years. In middle school I decided I wanted to be a poet. Dark, depressing poetry was my specialty. For my mom's birthday one year I gave her a binder of poetry I had written. Needless to say, more than a few eyebrows were raised around Grandma's dining room table when that was passed around. Poetry about contemplating the death of your parents isn't exactly a popular topic.
My penchant for dark writing did not end in middle school however. My sophomore year of high school my English teacher practically dragged me out of the computer lab across the hall to the counselor's office over a 50-60 word assignment. I wrote a memo about a hit man service. I think I caused a lot of misconception about myself. I wasn't this tormented dark soul crying out for help. I had a way with words and just happened to be good at the dark stuff.
My ideal career morphed over the years but always included writing in some form through my freshman year of college. By the time I hit my senior year of high school I had settled on being a journalist.
I figured journalism was a good career to write and still make a living. I didn't want to pay my dues as a starving author until I hit the big leagues. To gain experience, I joined the school paper,
The Talon. My previous experience with
The Talon was sophomore year when I submitted an editorial poem about the superintendent. He had chose not to cancel school one winter day and it was absolutely treacherous outside. My poem referred to him as the evil snow king. When it came time for the paper to be distributed, the staff had to pull out the page with my poem on it before they could hand it to a student. Apparently, my writing could have been considered libel.
Anyways, senior year I was official staff. There are several articles I am still proud of that I wrote. I still have every issue from that year.
My freshman year of college I started out as a journalism major. I was hired on to write for
The Washburn Review. For the first time, I was paid to write. However, terrible habits of procrastination and just not enough time in the world made my job more of a burden than a joy. I already worked 30 hours a week for a bank, took 18-21 credit hours a semester, joined a sorority, and was dealing with being away from home for the first time. The saddest part was I didn't enjoy my journalism classes. In fact I was bored stiff with them. I decided after that year that this was not the career path I wanted to take.
What was I going to be when I grew up??
I became a biology major for all of a semester. I suddenly had these aspirations of a becoming a pediatric oncologist. Mind you, math and physical science have never been a strong suit for me. My dreams died after taking general cellular biology (the entry level biology class for biology majors). I failed miserably. I never had to study hard before so my study habits were horrendous. Not to mention the fact that I discovered how much fun college parties can be. The only reason I retook the class was to get the F off of my record. I squeaked by with a C.
So there I was at the tender age of 20 wondering what the hell I was going to do with the rest of my life.
I began to seriously consider nursing. I was fascinated with the medical world and I like helping others. During this time my younger sister had become a CNA (certified nursing assistant) and always had great stories about her job. A couple of sorority sisters were nursing majors and worked as CNAs and loved it. I hadn't found anyone pursuing this career that had anything negative to say about it.
Because my career dreams had left me so burned previously I decided to begin my ascent into nursing slowly. I would work on my prerequisites for the RN program and also obtain my CNA. I figured if I couldn't handle being a CNA then there was no way I could handle being a RN.
My CNA class was easy breezy. The only problems I had were that I lacked the muscle to transfer patients and I was petrified of the geriatric population. Both of these issues resolved with time after I began to work as a CNA. I began to enjoy my patient interaction as I became more comfortable and it was a highlight to my coworkers once I could transfer patients by myself.
After awhile I wanted to move up in the field so while I continued to work on my prerequisites I took another class and achieved my CMA (certified medication aide). I trained on the med carts at work after I became certified and found that I enjoyed this part of nursing also. Becoming a CMA had a later benefit in nursing school because I was very familiar with medications at this point.
Finally, I had only a handful of prerequisites remaining. It was time to begin applying for BSN programs. Well, program I should say. I put all of my eggs in one basket. Of course I was rejected. Nursing programs are highly competitive and while my GPA was good, it was not fantastic. The couple of semesters where my studies slacked were coming back to haunt me.
I was at a crossroads again. Only this time I was sure of my destination. It was the getting there that was the problem. I knew I couldn't be in school forever and I couldn't make the living I wanted to with my current job.
I did some research about LPN programs. I found a program one hour away from home that was the top rated in the state of Kansas. I sent in my application and waited for a reply. A couple of months later I received a letter from the school requesting an interview. I was ecstatic! A few weeks later, all decked out in my "interview" outfit, I was on the road to my interview. Needless to say I was nervous. Somehow I managed to show confidence and make it through the interview. I left feeling unsure of how it would turn out.
After a couple more nail biting weeks I received my acceptance letter. I literally started jumping up and down for joy and then I started calling everyone. I truly felt for the first time that I was nearing my destination. This was my last big stop before RN school.
Fast forward nine months and I was graduating from LPN school. During my second semester I reapplied for the same BSN program. Shortly after graduation I received my acceptance letter into the BSN program. If you though I was ecstatic about LPN school you should have seen me about RN school.
During my seven month wait to start RN school I took (and passed) my LPN boards, worked a lot of overtime, and took even more classes.
Once I was in RN school, I felt at my element. I felt frustrated with "the system" many times (a lot of my classes were redundant) but overall I enjoyed my last two years of school. The only major mishap was second semester when life outside of school was threatening to do me in. I went through a very emotional point in my life and it almost set me back. I persevered though and managed to pass my classes so I could continue to move forward.
December 2009 I did the one thing I had set out to do six years prior: I graduated from college! In reality, I'd actually had this goal of a college degree since the second grade (only then I wanted a degree in English and I wanted to attend Smith College, just like Ann M. Martin). All the hard work and struggles (self-induced or otherwise) were worth it.
Two days after graduation I sat for my RN boards and passed. I have been working as a RN ever since.
This life journey is one I couldn't have made by myself. I have had an excellent support system that has grown while I have grown.
So, this is one of the stories that explains who I am today. What does my future career hold? More school probably. Luckily I know what field I want to be in, so it should be easier to stay on the path this time. Not that the path I have taken has been a bad one. It has many interesting diversions along the way. I wanted to be a psychologist for a couple of months, a meteorologist, an astronaut, a teacher, a mortician, a ballerina, a storm chaser, and probably several other jobs (trapeze artist was on the list at one point).
I've made the right decision about what I want to be when I grow up and I couldn't be happier.
